Gather around friends, I have something to tell you. For as long as I can remember I’ve always been known as the “happy girl”, it’s never been a bad thing, it’s just always been how I’ve been recognized. BUT it always felt like a label that I kind of needed to live up too, “don’t be sad, that’s not you”, “don’t let anyone see you cry, you’re better than that” (ironically now I constantly cry) #internalscreaming.
To be fair (please read that like Letterkenny, please) no one ever pushed me to be like that, no one said I had to be that girl, but I put it on my own shoulders. I love being happy, smiling, laughing, being goofy, etc.. I’ve said it before, it’s so much more important to me that I am funny rather than pretty. I would rather make you laugh for days then be the stereotypical version of pretty, and to be crystal clear, the girls and boys who are pretty and funny, I am simply envious of you in the best way and I don’t think its wrong for someone to want to be both or to want to be more pretty than funny, but just for me personally, funny is my favorite.
Life isn’t always easy, in fact it is rarely easy for me but that hasn’t stopped me from laughing at least once a day and always wanting to be there for other people when they need a pick me up. It isn’t a chore for me to be happy, but sometimes it does take a bit of work. Even when things suck and the world feels like it’s shrinking in around you and you’re struggling for each breath, remember you’re not alone. Even the most happy people or the people who seem the most happy have bad days, but the good thing about the bad is that it fades and it helps you remember how lucky you are to have the good.
Now onto the cover photo! I love a good selfie, I love self-love, I love, love. Basically I love everything but oddly enough when I look at photos of myself I can tell when its a fake smile and a real smile. This photo that I chose today and that I took today, is a real smile. It feels good to really smile. Today wasn’t easy, but it wasn’t bad. I was able to wake up, go to work, talk to other human beings, laugh and make jokes, talk to my family, I have a lot of things to the thankful for and to be happy for and since I’ve started genuinely appreciating the little things in my life, my life has gotten so much more bright.
There are a lot of truths in the world, you’re going to be broken, you’re going to cry, you’re going to lose someone you love and you’re going to be rejected but with each harsh truth comes an even more powerful realization. Yes, but if you’re never broken you can never be re-built, You’re going to cry happy tears too and those will mean so much more. Losing someone you love meant you had the opportunity to love someone enough that losing them doesn’t have to mean forgetting them. Rejection brings you one step closer to achieving your dreams, every time.
So let yourself cry, let yourself break, let your guard down and let yourself be happy, truly, embarrassingly, cheesily (not a word) happy. You deserve it.
xx your gal, AL.